Should I leave the job for which I am not competent? [on hold]





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As I said in the title I got the job but I know I am not competent for this job because I do not have enough knowledge about this job. I feel like I stole the job from someone who is eligible for the job.



But I really need money, because I have six family members and I am the only one who earns money. My salary is the only income of my house.



Please tell me what I can do in this situation. I feel I really stole the job from someone else.



I am really confused and upsets me so please tell me what I can do.










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Aaisha Anum is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
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put on hold as off-topic by gnat, Summer, IDrinkandIKnowThings, mxyzplk, Martin Tournoij yesterday


This question appears to be off-topic. The users who voted to close gave this specific reason:


  • "Questions asking for advice on a specific choice, such as what job to take or what skills to learn, are difficult to answer objectively and are rarely useful for anyone else. Instead of asking which decision to make, try asking how to make the decision, or for more specific details about one element of the decision. (More information)" – gnat, Summer

If this question can be reworded to fit the rules in the help center, please edit the question.













  • because i passed the interview but i guess that is my luck to pass the interview
    – Aaisha Anum
    Nov 15 at 14:31










  • Could you give a bit more detail about the kinds of things you feel your job needs you to know, but that you do not know?
    – Upper_Case
    Nov 15 at 21:08






  • 2




    Did you lie during your interview? If you didn't, then it's pretty hard to say that you defrauded anyone. If the company feels you are able to do the job, then you probably are.
    – TheSoundDefense
    Nov 15 at 21:34






  • 1




    Possible duplicate of Should I quit because I'm not up to the job?
    – IDrinkandIKnowThings
    Nov 16 at 17:56










  • What are the consequences of doing poorly at your job? Does someone die or get seriously maimed? Or does some rich person make less money than they otherwise would?
    – Adonalsium
    Nov 16 at 20:50

















up vote
-1
down vote

favorite












As I said in the title I got the job but I know I am not competent for this job because I do not have enough knowledge about this job. I feel like I stole the job from someone who is eligible for the job.



But I really need money, because I have six family members and I am the only one who earns money. My salary is the only income of my house.



Please tell me what I can do in this situation. I feel I really stole the job from someone else.



I am really confused and upsets me so please tell me what I can do.










share|improve this question









New contributor




Aaisha Anum is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.











put on hold as off-topic by gnat, Summer, IDrinkandIKnowThings, mxyzplk, Martin Tournoij yesterday


This question appears to be off-topic. The users who voted to close gave this specific reason:


  • "Questions asking for advice on a specific choice, such as what job to take or what skills to learn, are difficult to answer objectively and are rarely useful for anyone else. Instead of asking which decision to make, try asking how to make the decision, or for more specific details about one element of the decision. (More information)" – gnat, Summer

If this question can be reworded to fit the rules in the help center, please edit the question.













  • because i passed the interview but i guess that is my luck to pass the interview
    – Aaisha Anum
    Nov 15 at 14:31










  • Could you give a bit more detail about the kinds of things you feel your job needs you to know, but that you do not know?
    – Upper_Case
    Nov 15 at 21:08






  • 2




    Did you lie during your interview? If you didn't, then it's pretty hard to say that you defrauded anyone. If the company feels you are able to do the job, then you probably are.
    – TheSoundDefense
    Nov 15 at 21:34






  • 1




    Possible duplicate of Should I quit because I'm not up to the job?
    – IDrinkandIKnowThings
    Nov 16 at 17:56










  • What are the consequences of doing poorly at your job? Does someone die or get seriously maimed? Or does some rich person make less money than they otherwise would?
    – Adonalsium
    Nov 16 at 20:50













up vote
-1
down vote

favorite









up vote
-1
down vote

favorite











As I said in the title I got the job but I know I am not competent for this job because I do not have enough knowledge about this job. I feel like I stole the job from someone who is eligible for the job.



But I really need money, because I have six family members and I am the only one who earns money. My salary is the only income of my house.



Please tell me what I can do in this situation. I feel I really stole the job from someone else.



I am really confused and upsets me so please tell me what I can do.










share|improve this question









New contributor




Aaisha Anum is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.











As I said in the title I got the job but I know I am not competent for this job because I do not have enough knowledge about this job. I feel like I stole the job from someone who is eligible for the job.



But I really need money, because I have six family members and I am the only one who earns money. My salary is the only income of my house.



Please tell me what I can do in this situation. I feel I really stole the job from someone else.



I am really confused and upsets me so please tell me what I can do.







salary quitting skills






share|improve this question









New contributor




Aaisha Anum is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.











share|improve this question









New contributor




Aaisha Anum is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.









share|improve this question




share|improve this question








edited Nov 15 at 22:06









jcmack

6,0531935




6,0531935






New contributor




Aaisha Anum is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.









asked Nov 15 at 14:28









Aaisha Anum

74




74




New contributor




Aaisha Anum is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.





New contributor





Aaisha Anum is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.






Aaisha Anum is a new contributor to this site. Take care in asking for clarification, commenting, and answering.
Check out our Code of Conduct.




put on hold as off-topic by gnat, Summer, IDrinkandIKnowThings, mxyzplk, Martin Tournoij yesterday


This question appears to be off-topic. The users who voted to close gave this specific reason:


  • "Questions asking for advice on a specific choice, such as what job to take or what skills to learn, are difficult to answer objectively and are rarely useful for anyone else. Instead of asking which decision to make, try asking how to make the decision, or for more specific details about one element of the decision. (More information)" – gnat, Summer

If this question can be reworded to fit the rules in the help center, please edit the question.




put on hold as off-topic by gnat, Summer, IDrinkandIKnowThings, mxyzplk, Martin Tournoij yesterday


This question appears to be off-topic. The users who voted to close gave this specific reason:


  • "Questions asking for advice on a specific choice, such as what job to take or what skills to learn, are difficult to answer objectively and are rarely useful for anyone else. Instead of asking which decision to make, try asking how to make the decision, or for more specific details about one element of the decision. (More information)" – gnat, Summer

If this question can be reworded to fit the rules in the help center, please edit the question.












  • because i passed the interview but i guess that is my luck to pass the interview
    – Aaisha Anum
    Nov 15 at 14:31










  • Could you give a bit more detail about the kinds of things you feel your job needs you to know, but that you do not know?
    – Upper_Case
    Nov 15 at 21:08






  • 2




    Did you lie during your interview? If you didn't, then it's pretty hard to say that you defrauded anyone. If the company feels you are able to do the job, then you probably are.
    – TheSoundDefense
    Nov 15 at 21:34






  • 1




    Possible duplicate of Should I quit because I'm not up to the job?
    – IDrinkandIKnowThings
    Nov 16 at 17:56










  • What are the consequences of doing poorly at your job? Does someone die or get seriously maimed? Or does some rich person make less money than they otherwise would?
    – Adonalsium
    Nov 16 at 20:50


















  • because i passed the interview but i guess that is my luck to pass the interview
    – Aaisha Anum
    Nov 15 at 14:31










  • Could you give a bit more detail about the kinds of things you feel your job needs you to know, but that you do not know?
    – Upper_Case
    Nov 15 at 21:08






  • 2




    Did you lie during your interview? If you didn't, then it's pretty hard to say that you defrauded anyone. If the company feels you are able to do the job, then you probably are.
    – TheSoundDefense
    Nov 15 at 21:34






  • 1




    Possible duplicate of Should I quit because I'm not up to the job?
    – IDrinkandIKnowThings
    Nov 16 at 17:56










  • What are the consequences of doing poorly at your job? Does someone die or get seriously maimed? Or does some rich person make less money than they otherwise would?
    – Adonalsium
    Nov 16 at 20:50
















because i passed the interview but i guess that is my luck to pass the interview
– Aaisha Anum
Nov 15 at 14:31




because i passed the interview but i guess that is my luck to pass the interview
– Aaisha Anum
Nov 15 at 14:31












Could you give a bit more detail about the kinds of things you feel your job needs you to know, but that you do not know?
– Upper_Case
Nov 15 at 21:08




Could you give a bit more detail about the kinds of things you feel your job needs you to know, but that you do not know?
– Upper_Case
Nov 15 at 21:08




2




2




Did you lie during your interview? If you didn't, then it's pretty hard to say that you defrauded anyone. If the company feels you are able to do the job, then you probably are.
– TheSoundDefense
Nov 15 at 21:34




Did you lie during your interview? If you didn't, then it's pretty hard to say that you defrauded anyone. If the company feels you are able to do the job, then you probably are.
– TheSoundDefense
Nov 15 at 21:34




1




1




Possible duplicate of Should I quit because I'm not up to the job?
– IDrinkandIKnowThings
Nov 16 at 17:56




Possible duplicate of Should I quit because I'm not up to the job?
– IDrinkandIKnowThings
Nov 16 at 17:56












What are the consequences of doing poorly at your job? Does someone die or get seriously maimed? Or does some rich person make less money than they otherwise would?
– Adonalsium
Nov 16 at 20:50




What are the consequences of doing poorly at your job? Does someone die or get seriously maimed? Or does some rich person make less money than they otherwise would?
– Adonalsium
Nov 16 at 20:50










4 Answers
4






active

oldest

votes

















up vote
20
down vote













https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Impostor_syndrome




Impostor syndrome (also known as impostor phenomenon, impostorism,
fraud syndrome or the impostor experience) is a psychological pattern
in which an individual doubts their accomplishments and has a
persistent internalized fear of being exposed as a "fraud".[1] Despite
external evidence of their competence, those experiencing this
phenomenon remain convinced that they are frauds, and do not deserve
all they have achieved. Individuals with impostorism incorrectly
attribute their success to luck, or as a result of deceiving others
into thinking they are more intelligent than they perceive themselves
to be.[2] While early research focused on the prevalence among
high-achieving women, impostor syndrome has been recognized to affect
both men and women equally.[1][3] Impostor phenomenon is not a mental
disorder, yet there is research describing various management styles
for this internal experience.




If they gave you the job they think you're good enough. Time to believe them over your lying brain.






share|improve this answer

















  • 3




    +1 Like I used to say to my direct reports "I wouldn't have hired you if I didn't think you could do the job." There is always an onboarding period for every job, but don't be afraid to ask questions!
    – jcmack
    Nov 15 at 22:08


















up vote
4
down vote













Do your best to study and learn the skills and duties required for the job. You will improve your performance and gain confidence in what you do. Don't be afraid to ask questions and learn something new.






share|improve this answer




























    up vote
    2
    down vote













    I'm going to say that if you've received the offer, you're likely qualified enough for the job. Impostor syndrome is a powerful thing. It's totally natural.



    However, when you say this:




    The thing which confuses me is that I defrauded someone who is eligible for the job where I stand and.....




    It makes me feel as if you've blatantly lied on your skill set in order to get the job. Maybe you can provide more context?



    If you've lied on your resume and are truly not qualified for the job, it's probably best to identify the areas in which you are lacking. Are these things that you can learn on the job quickly and with no serious repercussions? If so, get to work. If not, then it's best to probably come clean and apply for other jobs before this gets ugly.






    share|improve this answer




























      up vote
      0
      down vote













      You say you have a family of six and you are the only one to earn money. Who are your loyalties with: Are you loyal to your family and put food on the table, or are you loyal to some stranger who would laugh about you if you gave up your job to them?



      You didn't steal someone's job. Nobody has the right to a particular job. You went to a job interview, you did well, you convinced the company to hire you, you do your work, and you get paid. It's between you and the company, not between you and some random stranger.



      Here's what you do: Next morning before you go to work, you stand in front of mirror and say: "I deserve this job. I can do this job. I work hard, and I deserve what I get paid, and I deserve to be the one doing the job and getting paid. If there are things I don't know, I'll learn them and deserve my job even more." You say this loud. Act that way every day. And eventually, you will believe it. Your colleagues may believe it before you do. Your boss believes it now.






      share|improve this answer




























        4 Answers
        4






        active

        oldest

        votes








        4 Answers
        4






        active

        oldest

        votes









        active

        oldest

        votes






        active

        oldest

        votes








        up vote
        20
        down vote













        https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Impostor_syndrome




        Impostor syndrome (also known as impostor phenomenon, impostorism,
        fraud syndrome or the impostor experience) is a psychological pattern
        in which an individual doubts their accomplishments and has a
        persistent internalized fear of being exposed as a "fraud".[1] Despite
        external evidence of their competence, those experiencing this
        phenomenon remain convinced that they are frauds, and do not deserve
        all they have achieved. Individuals with impostorism incorrectly
        attribute their success to luck, or as a result of deceiving others
        into thinking they are more intelligent than they perceive themselves
        to be.[2] While early research focused on the prevalence among
        high-achieving women, impostor syndrome has been recognized to affect
        both men and women equally.[1][3] Impostor phenomenon is not a mental
        disorder, yet there is research describing various management styles
        for this internal experience.




        If they gave you the job they think you're good enough. Time to believe them over your lying brain.






        share|improve this answer

















        • 3




          +1 Like I used to say to my direct reports "I wouldn't have hired you if I didn't think you could do the job." There is always an onboarding period for every job, but don't be afraid to ask questions!
          – jcmack
          Nov 15 at 22:08















        up vote
        20
        down vote













        https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Impostor_syndrome




        Impostor syndrome (also known as impostor phenomenon, impostorism,
        fraud syndrome or the impostor experience) is a psychological pattern
        in which an individual doubts their accomplishments and has a
        persistent internalized fear of being exposed as a "fraud".[1] Despite
        external evidence of their competence, those experiencing this
        phenomenon remain convinced that they are frauds, and do not deserve
        all they have achieved. Individuals with impostorism incorrectly
        attribute their success to luck, or as a result of deceiving others
        into thinking they are more intelligent than they perceive themselves
        to be.[2] While early research focused on the prevalence among
        high-achieving women, impostor syndrome has been recognized to affect
        both men and women equally.[1][3] Impostor phenomenon is not a mental
        disorder, yet there is research describing various management styles
        for this internal experience.




        If they gave you the job they think you're good enough. Time to believe them over your lying brain.






        share|improve this answer

















        • 3




          +1 Like I used to say to my direct reports "I wouldn't have hired you if I didn't think you could do the job." There is always an onboarding period for every job, but don't be afraid to ask questions!
          – jcmack
          Nov 15 at 22:08













        up vote
        20
        down vote










        up vote
        20
        down vote









        https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Impostor_syndrome




        Impostor syndrome (also known as impostor phenomenon, impostorism,
        fraud syndrome or the impostor experience) is a psychological pattern
        in which an individual doubts their accomplishments and has a
        persistent internalized fear of being exposed as a "fraud".[1] Despite
        external evidence of their competence, those experiencing this
        phenomenon remain convinced that they are frauds, and do not deserve
        all they have achieved. Individuals with impostorism incorrectly
        attribute their success to luck, or as a result of deceiving others
        into thinking they are more intelligent than they perceive themselves
        to be.[2] While early research focused on the prevalence among
        high-achieving women, impostor syndrome has been recognized to affect
        both men and women equally.[1][3] Impostor phenomenon is not a mental
        disorder, yet there is research describing various management styles
        for this internal experience.




        If they gave you the job they think you're good enough. Time to believe them over your lying brain.






        share|improve this answer












        https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Impostor_syndrome




        Impostor syndrome (also known as impostor phenomenon, impostorism,
        fraud syndrome or the impostor experience) is a psychological pattern
        in which an individual doubts their accomplishments and has a
        persistent internalized fear of being exposed as a "fraud".[1] Despite
        external evidence of their competence, those experiencing this
        phenomenon remain convinced that they are frauds, and do not deserve
        all they have achieved. Individuals with impostorism incorrectly
        attribute their success to luck, or as a result of deceiving others
        into thinking they are more intelligent than they perceive themselves
        to be.[2] While early research focused on the prevalence among
        high-achieving women, impostor syndrome has been recognized to affect
        both men and women equally.[1][3] Impostor phenomenon is not a mental
        disorder, yet there is research describing various management styles
        for this internal experience.




        If they gave you the job they think you're good enough. Time to believe them over your lying brain.







        share|improve this answer












        share|improve this answer



        share|improve this answer










        answered Nov 15 at 14:35









        tomdemaine

        34512




        34512








        • 3




          +1 Like I used to say to my direct reports "I wouldn't have hired you if I didn't think you could do the job." There is always an onboarding period for every job, but don't be afraid to ask questions!
          – jcmack
          Nov 15 at 22:08














        • 3




          +1 Like I used to say to my direct reports "I wouldn't have hired you if I didn't think you could do the job." There is always an onboarding period for every job, but don't be afraid to ask questions!
          – jcmack
          Nov 15 at 22:08








        3




        3




        +1 Like I used to say to my direct reports "I wouldn't have hired you if I didn't think you could do the job." There is always an onboarding period for every job, but don't be afraid to ask questions!
        – jcmack
        Nov 15 at 22:08




        +1 Like I used to say to my direct reports "I wouldn't have hired you if I didn't think you could do the job." There is always an onboarding period for every job, but don't be afraid to ask questions!
        – jcmack
        Nov 15 at 22:08












        up vote
        4
        down vote













        Do your best to study and learn the skills and duties required for the job. You will improve your performance and gain confidence in what you do. Don't be afraid to ask questions and learn something new.






        share|improve this answer

























          up vote
          4
          down vote













          Do your best to study and learn the skills and duties required for the job. You will improve your performance and gain confidence in what you do. Don't be afraid to ask questions and learn something new.






          share|improve this answer























            up vote
            4
            down vote










            up vote
            4
            down vote









            Do your best to study and learn the skills and duties required for the job. You will improve your performance and gain confidence in what you do. Don't be afraid to ask questions and learn something new.






            share|improve this answer












            Do your best to study and learn the skills and duties required for the job. You will improve your performance and gain confidence in what you do. Don't be afraid to ask questions and learn something new.







            share|improve this answer












            share|improve this answer



            share|improve this answer










            answered Nov 15 at 14:46









            B540Glenn

            1834




            1834






















                up vote
                2
                down vote













                I'm going to say that if you've received the offer, you're likely qualified enough for the job. Impostor syndrome is a powerful thing. It's totally natural.



                However, when you say this:




                The thing which confuses me is that I defrauded someone who is eligible for the job where I stand and.....




                It makes me feel as if you've blatantly lied on your skill set in order to get the job. Maybe you can provide more context?



                If you've lied on your resume and are truly not qualified for the job, it's probably best to identify the areas in which you are lacking. Are these things that you can learn on the job quickly and with no serious repercussions? If so, get to work. If not, then it's best to probably come clean and apply for other jobs before this gets ugly.






                share|improve this answer

























                  up vote
                  2
                  down vote













                  I'm going to say that if you've received the offer, you're likely qualified enough for the job. Impostor syndrome is a powerful thing. It's totally natural.



                  However, when you say this:




                  The thing which confuses me is that I defrauded someone who is eligible for the job where I stand and.....




                  It makes me feel as if you've blatantly lied on your skill set in order to get the job. Maybe you can provide more context?



                  If you've lied on your resume and are truly not qualified for the job, it's probably best to identify the areas in which you are lacking. Are these things that you can learn on the job quickly and with no serious repercussions? If so, get to work. If not, then it's best to probably come clean and apply for other jobs before this gets ugly.






                  share|improve this answer























                    up vote
                    2
                    down vote










                    up vote
                    2
                    down vote









                    I'm going to say that if you've received the offer, you're likely qualified enough for the job. Impostor syndrome is a powerful thing. It's totally natural.



                    However, when you say this:




                    The thing which confuses me is that I defrauded someone who is eligible for the job where I stand and.....




                    It makes me feel as if you've blatantly lied on your skill set in order to get the job. Maybe you can provide more context?



                    If you've lied on your resume and are truly not qualified for the job, it's probably best to identify the areas in which you are lacking. Are these things that you can learn on the job quickly and with no serious repercussions? If so, get to work. If not, then it's best to probably come clean and apply for other jobs before this gets ugly.






                    share|improve this answer












                    I'm going to say that if you've received the offer, you're likely qualified enough for the job. Impostor syndrome is a powerful thing. It's totally natural.



                    However, when you say this:




                    The thing which confuses me is that I defrauded someone who is eligible for the job where I stand and.....




                    It makes me feel as if you've blatantly lied on your skill set in order to get the job. Maybe you can provide more context?



                    If you've lied on your resume and are truly not qualified for the job, it's probably best to identify the areas in which you are lacking. Are these things that you can learn on the job quickly and with no serious repercussions? If so, get to work. If not, then it's best to probably come clean and apply for other jobs before this gets ugly.







                    share|improve this answer












                    share|improve this answer



                    share|improve this answer










                    answered Nov 15 at 20:14







                    user94471





























                        up vote
                        0
                        down vote













                        You say you have a family of six and you are the only one to earn money. Who are your loyalties with: Are you loyal to your family and put food on the table, or are you loyal to some stranger who would laugh about you if you gave up your job to them?



                        You didn't steal someone's job. Nobody has the right to a particular job. You went to a job interview, you did well, you convinced the company to hire you, you do your work, and you get paid. It's between you and the company, not between you and some random stranger.



                        Here's what you do: Next morning before you go to work, you stand in front of mirror and say: "I deserve this job. I can do this job. I work hard, and I deserve what I get paid, and I deserve to be the one doing the job and getting paid. If there are things I don't know, I'll learn them and deserve my job even more." You say this loud. Act that way every day. And eventually, you will believe it. Your colleagues may believe it before you do. Your boss believes it now.






                        share|improve this answer

























                          up vote
                          0
                          down vote













                          You say you have a family of six and you are the only one to earn money. Who are your loyalties with: Are you loyal to your family and put food on the table, or are you loyal to some stranger who would laugh about you if you gave up your job to them?



                          You didn't steal someone's job. Nobody has the right to a particular job. You went to a job interview, you did well, you convinced the company to hire you, you do your work, and you get paid. It's between you and the company, not between you and some random stranger.



                          Here's what you do: Next morning before you go to work, you stand in front of mirror and say: "I deserve this job. I can do this job. I work hard, and I deserve what I get paid, and I deserve to be the one doing the job and getting paid. If there are things I don't know, I'll learn them and deserve my job even more." You say this loud. Act that way every day. And eventually, you will believe it. Your colleagues may believe it before you do. Your boss believes it now.






                          share|improve this answer























                            up vote
                            0
                            down vote










                            up vote
                            0
                            down vote









                            You say you have a family of six and you are the only one to earn money. Who are your loyalties with: Are you loyal to your family and put food on the table, or are you loyal to some stranger who would laugh about you if you gave up your job to them?



                            You didn't steal someone's job. Nobody has the right to a particular job. You went to a job interview, you did well, you convinced the company to hire you, you do your work, and you get paid. It's between you and the company, not between you and some random stranger.



                            Here's what you do: Next morning before you go to work, you stand in front of mirror and say: "I deserve this job. I can do this job. I work hard, and I deserve what I get paid, and I deserve to be the one doing the job and getting paid. If there are things I don't know, I'll learn them and deserve my job even more." You say this loud. Act that way every day. And eventually, you will believe it. Your colleagues may believe it before you do. Your boss believes it now.






                            share|improve this answer












                            You say you have a family of six and you are the only one to earn money. Who are your loyalties with: Are you loyal to your family and put food on the table, or are you loyal to some stranger who would laugh about you if you gave up your job to them?



                            You didn't steal someone's job. Nobody has the right to a particular job. You went to a job interview, you did well, you convinced the company to hire you, you do your work, and you get paid. It's between you and the company, not between you and some random stranger.



                            Here's what you do: Next morning before you go to work, you stand in front of mirror and say: "I deserve this job. I can do this job. I work hard, and I deserve what I get paid, and I deserve to be the one doing the job and getting paid. If there are things I don't know, I'll learn them and deserve my job even more." You say this loud. Act that way every day. And eventually, you will believe it. Your colleagues may believe it before you do. Your boss believes it now.







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                            answered Nov 16 at 19:42









                            gnasher729

                            79.3k34144250




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